My So Called Life

This, my friends, is a disturbingly accurate picture
of my life delivered right to my email. So I give it
to you...

You know you are a flight attendant if:

1. You can eat a four course meal standing at the
kitchen counter
2. You search for a button to flush the toilet
3. You look for the "crew line" at the grocery store
4. You can pack for a two week trip to Europe in one
roll-aboard
5. All your pens have different hotel names on them
6. You NEVER unpack
7. You can recognize pilots by the backs of their
heads-but not by
their faces
8. You can tell from 70 yards away if a piece of
luggage will fit in
the
overhead bin
9. You care about the local news in a city three
states away
10. You can tie a neck scarf 36 ways
11. You know at least 25 uses for air sickness
bags-none of which
pertain to vomit
12. You understand and actually use the 24-hour clock
13. You own 2 sets of uniforms: fat and thin
14. You don't think in "months" - you think in "bid
packs"
15. You always point with two fingers
16. You get a little too excited by certain types of
ice
17. You stand at the front door and politely say,
"Buh-bye, thanks,
have a nice day" when someone leaves your home
18. You can make a sentence using all of the following
phrases:
"At this time," "For your safety," "Feel free," and
"As a reminder"
19. You know what's on the cover of the current issues
of In Touch,
Star, and People magazines
20. You stop and inspect every fire extinguisher you
pass, just to make
sure the "gauge is in the green"
21. Your thighs are covered in bruises from armrests
and elbows
22. You wake up and have to look at the hotel
stationery to figure out
where you are.
23. You refer to cities by their airport codes
24. Every time the doorbell rings you look at the
ceiling
25. You actually understand every item on this list