My Mommy!

My mommy is so smart. My mommy is so pretty. Your mommy ain't got nothing on mine!

Happy Mothers Day, mommy!

In honor of my mom, I would like to present to you, dear readers, some sage little gems of experience, love, and wisdom that my mom has given me, over the years.

Mommy gem number one:

And I quote: “If it's a gift, gift wrap it!” As stated via post-it stuck to the dining room table to my 22 year old brother on her way out of town. She had no illusions of keeping the girlfriend out. At 15, I had no idea what the hell she was talking about. I remember the exact moment, about two years later, that it finally made sense. The advice, though not directly meant for me at the time has served me well. So thank you mom!

Mommy Gem number two:

Again, I quote: “ Don't get married. Live in Sin.” Yes, you read that correctly. My catholic born and bred Puerto Rican mommy has told all of us girls and boy this repeatedly and frequently throughout our entire adolescence and adulthood. Now, now, calm your outrage! There is a back story.

My mom grew up poor. My mom grew up poor and Puerto Rican in Brooklyn, NY. Marriages were made young. Babies, too, were made young. Too young. My mom wanted more than that for us. She put herself through school with two young children in her early twenties as a single mom. She remembers what it is to be skinny not because you work at it but because you don't have enough to eat. She never wanted us to know that.

Now, of course, at 27 and having lived in sin with the venerable Ross for nearly eight years, I am sure she is ready to sing a different tune, but that's a story for a different day, isn't it?

Mommy Gem number three:

“Always go pee after sex. It cleans the toxins out of your bladder. Boys are naturally dirty, it's not there fault. Trust me, your bladder will thank you.” This she said to my 21 year old self and my college roommate Keri over drinks at a hotel bar in Albany, NY. Both Keri and I thank her for this.

Mommy Gem number four:

“EPIDURAL”. Not that I have yet had an opportunity to demand one. But I have every intention of utilizing it when the time is right. Natural childbirth is for the birds!

Mommy Gem number five:

“Love doesn't just come to you. It isn't magic. You have to reach out and grab it and fight for it. Never let it go. Work for it. Earn it.”

Mommy never said this, exactly, but she lives it. And I understand this and I try to live it, too. With the exception of her love. Amazingly enough, I get that for free! Even when I don't deserve it. For that, mom, I thank you. I love you, mom!

Happy Mothers Day

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