World Airways Commercial from 1985 starring George Burns

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Friday, February 02, 2007

She has Issues, I tell you!

Okay, I think that princess has issues. Those of you that know her would obviously look at me and say “DUH! She's a psycho beast from hell. Of course she has issues!”


Of these issues I am well aware. I am talking about NEW issues, of course.


You see, Princess has actively taken up singing. Yes, kids, I do mean singing. She LOVES to sing. I kid you not. Whenever I start singing she bounds over from whatever rooms she happens to find herself in to stand at my side, nose way way way up in the air, howling along.


At first I thought that she didn't like Bonnie Raitt, or maybe Christmas music. And really, who could blame her for hating Christmas music? Does anyone really like the 12 days of Christmas? It goes on for eons! And what in the hell does “Fa la la la la” really mean?


But lately this bizarre dog sing along has escalated way out of control. Really. Every time I sing scales for warm up or attempt a bar of any tune princess immediately starts yowling along. I swear, she is even trying to yowl in the same key that I am in. It's eerie.


But, in truth, I can not say that I am surprised to see princess trying to steal my thunder. Yes, I know this may sound weird, but I am pretty damn convinced that she is trying to steal Ross, as well. It does make sense. She's always flirting with him, she howls and barks till he comes out of our room in the early morning to sleep with her on the couch. She gets annoyed and jealous when I come home from work trips. And she always tries to sit in the front seat next to Ross when we are all in the car together.


As Ross is fond of saying that she is only one IQ point short of human she obviously thinks that it is time for her to get a boyfriend, too. Mine, actually.


And this is only step one in her nefarious plan.


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